Year ender 2016

Many things had happened this 2016. Some are good and some are not so bad. There were many big realizations I also learned and the most important lesson is to not to take for granted the blessings God has given to me. I've been ungrateful and wishing that things must be better, envious of everyone else. Not thinking that my life has been blessed too with so much love and favors from the above. I don't have the title at work nor at the society. I'm not the healthy buff nor recognize as prominent person. I don't have wealth and even a family of my own. But I do learn to love myself and my God even more. This is the most blessed gift I have received. And so with so many trials ahead, I only have to rely on myself and be the best that I can be, praying to Almighty God that with His help I will surpass these and be able to succeed. Who can really say life is fair. We just keep on fighting and moving on. At the end of the day we can only say we succeed if we found the everlasting happiness and that is when we really found love.

Second Chances

Today is the last day I prayed to have a new job offer. Today is my deadline for new work. Today is simply another day for me to accept defeat. Am I bound to leave merlion's city? And need to go back to the pearl of the orient sea? I heaved a big sigh.. A time for surrender. Mostly those with job openings now are those that banned me and would not give me second chance. I know it is my fault and I'm truly sorry for my negligence. I promise to work harder given another chance. But I'm losing time. I don't have enough buffer to be a bum. I need a new work really soon. I know deep in my heart I'm one of the best analyst around. I'm kind, passionate and responsible. Though I can have an attitude at times. But that makes me human. I just don't get it that while others who really answered back to big bosses were given second chance while me who only wanted a better life, a better pay (that is always the reason of moving out) yet I cannot go back. It is a sad world to have a permanent residence yet I don't have means to earn a living. I simply cannot survive this expensive city. I want to stay for few more years to clear my debts, to fully recover from depression, to fully have my confidence back and to have my dignity back. I prayed hard that for nth chance I will be given another chance. It is only the christmas present I wanted. I know and regret a lot for all the chances I have before and now I'm losing my magic. Nobody wanted my services anymore. I don't think it is because of holiday rush that everybody is busy because here christmas day is just an ordinary day and everybody is busy body and focus on work. For the remaining days of 2016, it is a hard lesson for me not to take for granted all the blessings and to be punctual and more diligent. Hoping for the best. Hoping for second chance.